NAVY RESERVIST FREEZER MURDER SUSPECT IN HONG KONG
In a thrilling episode of “America’s Most Wanted: Frequent Flyer Edition,” a Navy reservist from Virginia accused of murdering his wife and stashing her body in the freezer was finally arrested in Hong Kong after a two-month international manhunt, because apparently even the most heinous alleged crimes now come with a passport stamp and a very expensive travel itinerary. FBI Director Kash Patel called it a “successful overseas apprehension,” which is government-speak for “we found him before he could become somebody else’s problem,” and then solemnly reminded everyone that justice doesn’t forget, unlike the rest of us trying to keep track of whether this is law enforcement or a grim, bureaucratic global scavenger hunt. After a quick stop in San Francisco and a court appearance there, Varela was shipped onward to Virginia, where the legal system will now proceed with all the efficiency and drama of a suitcase being rerouted at an airport nobody asked to visit.
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Today’s Birthday
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Sirimavo Bandaranaike (1916)April 17, 2026
_(Hon.Sirimavo_Bandaranaike_with_Hon.Lalith_Athulathmudali_Crop).jpg)
Bandaranaike's husband became prime minister of Ceylon in 1956 and was assassinated three years later. In the election that followed, Bandaranaike's party was victorious—making her the world's first female prime minister. She headed two coalition governments and served again as prime minister when she was appointed by her daughter, Chandrika Kumaratunga, who was elected president in 1994. While in office, Bandaranaike promoted a new constitution that changed the country's name to what?
_(Hon.Sirimavo_Bandaranaike_with_Hon.Lalith_Athulathmudali_Crop).jpg)
Bandaranaike's husband became prime minister of Ceylon in 1956 and was assassinated three years later. In the election that followed, Bandaranaike's party was victorious—making her the world's first female prime minister. She headed two coalition governments and served again as prime minister when she was appointed by her daughter, Chandrika Kumaratunga, who was elected president in 1994. While in office, Bandaranaike promoted a new constitution that changed the country's name to what?Today’s Holiday
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Verrazano DayApril 17, 2026
Observed in New York state, Verrazano Day commemorates the discovery of New York Harbor by the Italian navigator Giovanni da Verrazano on April 17, 1524. With the backing of King Francis I of France, Verrazano sailed his ship to the New World, reaching the Carolina coast in March 1524, and then sailing northward, exploring the eastern coast of North America. He also discovered Block Island and Narragansett Bay in what is now Rhode Island. In naming the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge, New York gave Verrazano official recognition.
Observed in New York state, Verrazano Day commemorates the discovery of New York Harbor by the Italian navigator ARTICLE OF THE DAY
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Exquisite CorpseApril 17, 2026
Exquisite corpse is an exercise in which a collection of words or images is assembled by several participants, each of whom adds to a composition by either following a predetermined sequence—such as adjective-noun-adverb-verb-article-adjective-noun—or by looking at the end of the previous entry. The name of the game is derived from the phrase that French Surrealists created when they first played it in 1925: "Le cadavre exquis boira le vin nouveau," which means what?
Exquisite corpse is an exercise in which a collection of words or images is assembled by several participants, each of whom adds to a composition by either following a predetermined sequence—such as adjective-noun-adverb-verb-article-adjective-noun—or by looking at the end of the previous entry. The name of the game is derived from the phrase that French Surrealists created when they first played it in 1925: "Le cadavre exquis boira le vin nouveau," which means what?
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